that new car smell a pack of cigarettes an unopened book – newness makes us believe, hope for something better than what we have now. if that’s the case, then why do i crave the familiarity of your face your gaze and your arms as they graze against mine? newness is overrated. i long for… Continue reading Everything is Better When It’s New
“4000+ chemicals, 43 of which are carcinogenic.” (From quitsmokingsupport.com) I like you in the way I like my cigarettes – always onhand. A constant. I am always craving more. Always wanting just one more hit – one more kiss. And yet you are infinitely better for me than these carcinogen sticks. And I don’t just… Continue reading What Cigarettes Contain
It makes you feel alone, even when you know there's a ton of people supporting you and loving you.It makes you distant and disconnected from what you enjoy – writing, going to the gym, eating – until nothing makes you happy anymore.It makes you wonder why on earth you should bother getting out of bed… Continue reading Depression is such a bitch to fight
I've been feeling like shit these past several days. Not wanting to do anything but stare off into space, not wanting to go to the gym, not wanting to write… I force myself to do all these, but I don't feel like it. I think I'm in another depressive state. I cannot help but think… Continue reading We will all turn to dust
I wasn’t truly serious about moving out. I was just browsing OLX looking for places to rent in Quezon City. I stumbled upon a posting of a room for rent which was pretty close to my office. It seemed affordable enough and had an air conditioner included in the room. Just because I didn’t have… Continue reading I moved out, again!
I’ve been struggling. I have several debts which I’ve yet to pay off. Because I’m broke, Tony and I haven’t gone out on a proper date in quite a while, which really bums me out. I keep thinking, “What a shitty life.” And that’s where I’m totally wrong. It’s not a shitty life. I’m just… Continue reading Recent struggles
The Best Friend always says that I’m too hard on myself. He usually tells me this when I rant to him about how shitty I am as a friend/daughter/worker. Hell, he tells me this when I tell him about how shitty I am overall as a person. Most of the time, I feel inadequate. Like somehow… Continue reading I need to give myself a break