friends · letters

An open letter to my “little sister”

We’ve known each other for more than 2 years now. I’d like to think you know me pretty well, and vice versa. Still, there were things that I’ve kept from you until recently.

See, I took on the role of your big sister and I took it seriously. I wanted to protect you from all that is bad: bad relationships, bad choices, you name it, I wanted none of it for you. So I hid my problems from you since I was afraid that you might be damaged by them, somehow.

Okay, let me be a bit geeky here and say that it’s such a Katniss-Prim (of The Hunger Games) feeling. You know the scene in Mockingjay where Prim says that Katniss can tell her secrets, and Katniss realizes that Prim has grown up? It feels a lot like that.

So I went and kept my mouth shut about my depression. I was afraid that you might not see me as your strong big sis anymore, that you might stop talking to me about your problems, and most of all, that you might not understand.

Safe to say, I misjudged you on all three counts. I know now that you truly love me as I am, despite my darkness. And I am so happy that you still look to me for guidance.

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